make sure you’re sitting down…

I don’t think you need to read the whole article, just check out the opening sentence:

 Beijing is the most beautiful city in China and Hong Kong the safest and second most beautiful, according to a study by the China Institute of City Competitiveness.

Alright, now that you’ve finished laughing:

I’ve even heard people call Tianjin “beautiful” (all Tianjinren of course), but I have never heard anybody describe Beijing as beautiful… well, maybe some of my students from Beijing have said something along those lines, as well as those from outside Beijing who say things like “I like Beijing because it’s the capital of China” and other non-sensical rubbish. Anyway: Beijing the most beautiful city in China? You’d have to be on a serious mixture of various hugely powerful hallucinogens to think such a thing. I mean: Dalian, Qingdao, Xiamen, Guilin……. Shit, even Changsha is more beautiful than Beijing. And Taiyuan would be if it weren’t for the pollution.

Alright, now continue reading that article, but make sure you have a change of underwear handy, you’re going to piss yourself laughing at the criteria for ranking cities.

And for the record: I love Beijing, and there are many beautiful places in Beijing (Jingshan, Longtanhu, Summer Palace, Old Summer Palace, Yanqing County, etc…) but still, I would not describe it as a beautiful city.

About the Author


A Kiwi teaching English to oil workers in Beijing, studying Chinese in my spare time, married to a beautiful Beijing lass, consuming vast quantities of green tea (usually Xihu Longjing/西湖龙井, if that means anything to you), eating good food (except for when I cook), missing good Kiwi ale, breathing smog, generally living as best I can outside Godzone and having a good time of it.

4 thoughts on “make sure you’re sitting down…

  1. Sometimes I lament the fact that I can’t get Comedy Central in China. And then I read China Daily.

    “The institute said Shanghai is developing a harmonious society ahead of the 2010 World Expo.”

    Agreed, Beijing is a cool place to be, but beautiful, not exactly.

  2. Hi Chris,
    Well, I have read the article and I have had a good laugh, but don;t quite know what to laugh about first, the whole article is just nonsenical.
    I also like Beijing, it is relatively easy to get around, and the transport infrastructure is pretty good. Whether I would describe it as beautiful, is uncertain,but to have Shenzhen even on the list is a joke.
    hong Kong being the safest city in China- a stretch I think….
    The whole article is trying once again to inflate the attractiveness of a few Chinese places known for money, wealth and extravaganse, with out taking into account other human aspects of the city make up. Another example of skillful journolistic nonsense from the state machine…brhmmmm brhmmmm

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